It’s no brainer that an Indian wedding isn’t at all complete without at least seven events namely; shagun, sagai, tilak, mehndi, sangeet, pheras and bidaai. My apologies if I forgot to mention three or four more crucial events of such festival. Festival? Yes, it indeed is. It deserves to be called a festival because after all it isn’t everyday a helicopter is called for courting the bride or villas are booked in exotic places like Udaipur to organize a lavish destination wedding with Angelina Jolie as the hon’ guest. Henceforth a festival!
The concept of awareness about such weddings soured in my mind when I came across a video on youtube. The name of the couple won’t be mentioned but the channel posting such videos is called PicturePerfectMumbai. The videos depicted wedding diaries of various couples hiring exotic looking wedding planners to undermine and calendarize a wedding of the same standard. What then follows in the videos is what appears to be loads of fun, dancing, drinking, and no one could forget the major selfies. Having said that, it is important to mention that naming the channel or highlighting such events isn’t done in a bad intentive manner or to bad mouth about anyone. The simple reason to know about such an occurrence is to highlight how marriages have become a commodity in place of auspicious occasions.
“I am a 26-year-old girl from Delhi and like any other young girl, I have many plans for my wedding with regard to my clothes, my look, etc. I have been in a relationship for the past eight years and I am very proud to say that my fiancé and I have been able to convince our parents to postpone our wedding till the time we are ready to shoulder its costs. We shall fulfill all our dreams to have a memorable day, but with our own money. Although we have given our parents a sense of social security by getting engaged, we shall marry only when we are worthy of it. So both partners should decide together and not under pressure. Society will always complain, but in the end, it’s us who will suffer over such decisions.” This information was shared by one of the viewers of highly acclaimed TV show Satyamev Jayte hosted by Aamir Khan on their show’s website. Confession from this girl proves how much deeply and intensively this predicament has settled into our systems where all people care about during such occasions is showcasing their wealth and disburse their money to have exorbitant everything
It’s bad effects? I believe it is bad enough that we see stars trying to marry again (with the same spouse as before and also there is nothing wrong with re-marrying) but only because distributors surmise it to be a brilliant idea to gather more ratings for the show. For example my mother is a self confessed ‘Yeh Rishta Kya Kehlata Hai’ fan. What I recently observed on the show was the track going on with the children of the lead pair wanting their parents to marry again with same rituals as a form of celebration with re-acquaintance with their family. It’s really precious to see how they are showing modern aged kids loving their parents the way they are doing and for having the guts to do something like that. But then again- distributors have to materialize it with everything. When middle-class audience, who are the most prime and paramount source of TRP’s for distributors watch it, they want to inculcate the same rituals into their life happenings. Wearing clothes worth lakhs among other things do not happen with people in middle class families. But hey- if Akshara does it, we’ve got to do it too. It spreads wrong message among the masses. Obviously enough, it comes with the warning that if you don’t want to watch it then shut down your T.V’s.
That’s just one of the many faces of the dynamics of a big fat Indian wedding. The amount of wastage at such weddings is an inexcusable sense of charity. Another prospect is even more grievous. It is when the groom’s side demands a lavish wedding from the bride’s side. It is because they are from ‘Groom’s Side’ and any type of behavior from them has to be tolerated. The bride’s side has to give in to each one of their demands which is repugnant to watch. And surely what about those people who cannot afford such luxuries even in their dreams? Well, inevitable it is a sore subject for them causing a lot of envy and self consciousness.
What we aim for with such articles is for people to consider not just one but various spectacles of their doings. Marriage is an auspicious occasion which unites not only two individuals but whole army of two individuals. It is okay and not a matter of guilt if you want a grand wedding because each one of us girls have imagined our hero with a knight in shining armor coming to our rescue on a white horse (thanks to the advocation of such an image from bollywood), but a little control would be nice. Or interestingly a site suggested how you could use all the money you save from a grand wedding in various lines such a luxurious honeymoon, or investing in a new house and a car, or creating a bank account, or most important of them all- feeding the under nourished and malnutritioned children of our country. If you didn’t know India had about 47.90 % of malnourished children under 5 in 2006 and it keeps on just growing . . . there is nothing more magical than blessings of a needy person.
Because you aim for a marriage not just a wedding!!